Laughing Wild

VIDEO0034.mp4 from Karla S on Vimeo.

I love these boys! This was right after scripture time, as you can tell they weren't the most reverent while we were reading. At least they got it out before bed :)

Snow

And so it begins. 

Karate uniform

Spencer just got his Karate uniform. He had been in Karate for 2 months and I think he wants to stay with it. Yesterday he got his suit and his white belt. Look out world :) 

A little something for Ella

 

I got two of these dolls. One to mail to Ella in a care package and one to keep for her, so she has one when she comes home. Isn't it too cute?! Also. . . 100% machine washable. . . This ain't my first rodeo.

Family

I got my willow tree figure today. I am so pleased with it. We now have our family represented. We now have Dave, me and our 5 children. I really like the style and now it feels great to see each little face and think of each of our little ones. 

Me and my Jacobite

Karla

Monday

Ella's photo book came. I love it. I just sit and look at it and imagine what it will be like when she can hold it and I hope her nannies read it to her. I watch her video everyday and have her little moves memorized. I wonder how she will respond to medical treatment for her orthopedic needs. I wonder what the neurologist will say about her seizures. I just have so many questions and I just can't help but think about Ella and how she is.

I was reading a blogger that recently came home with a three year old from China. Although every child is different there are certain patterns that can be seen. This is what they had to say about their 3 year old son:

"Rion threw insanely long and loud tantrums when he didn’t get his way.  We had to try and put aside our desire to discipline and instead to focus on helping him through this complicated grieving process, but it was so hard."

I know that is what is in my future. I am trying to prepare myself to meet her needs. I expect a lot of tantrums, crying and very difficult behavior. I am re-reading "The connected child" and also have a goal to spend at least 45 minutes everyday learning Chinese. I know Mandarin is very difficult and I do not expect to be be fluent (or even close to it) but if I can learn a  few phrases, it might help. I am using Mango Languages and we also have Rosetta Stone CDs. Between the two I hope I can  make things a little easier for Ella. I also plan to teach her sign language  to help bridge the language gap.

We sent our LOI on Sept. 4, just about 3 weeks ago. Our agency is telling us it could be between 5-16 weeks, however they are averaging 5-8 weeks. I hope we can get ours in 5 weeks. That would be the second week of October. China is closed for a national holiday Oct. 1-7. So it most certainly will not be before Oct. 7.  My fingers are crossed for Oct. 8th.

When I told Dave I was hoping for Oct. 8th, he smiled and said, "That might be technically possible, but it is not very realistic."

My reply, "I don't want to be realistic."

Oops, did I say that out loud? :)

I am just looking for things to keep me busy. I already have three very active and amazing boys, they do keep me busy. But there is a hole where Ella should be. I watch the boys play and can see her fitting in right there. I have a whole wardrobe for Ella just waiting in the closet. I have already ordered some dolls and keep looking at toys for her. I am making plans for Spencer and Jacob to share a room with "bump beds" as Jacob calls them. We are going to add some closet rods to help with extra hanging space. All these plans and ideas. . . they all lead me back to Ella.

Every day she is there is day we lose to help her transition. Think about the stats:

• Chinese children raised in orphanages lose approximately 1 month of linear growth for every 3 months in orphanage care.

• 60% of orphanage children ages 24 to 30 months were not talking.  By age 3 and 4 the children were described as having limited vocabulary, receptive language delays, and unintelligible speech.

Not only am I talking about language delay I am talking about the emotional and social  delays. Children were meant to have a mom and a dad there to love and nurture them from their first breath. And although I am very optimistic that Ella will be resilient and her strength will come shining through, I can't stand that I can't be there to tuck her in and read her a story. I must wait for months to get her the proper medical care she needs. I already feel like her mom and waiting months and months is simply hard, especially when I know each day she stays institutionalized is another step backwards in her development.

I don't mean to be a downer, this is simply how I (and many others moms and dads waiting to bring home their child) feel. Oh Ella, how I love you. Every though there will be meltdowns, tantrums and grieving I know we can work through the issues together, as a family. It is so sweet to hear Jacob and Spencer pray for their little sister. Having Ella changes all of our lives.

Moon Festival

Moon Festival, Autumn Festival, Mid-Autumn Festival, Autumn Moon Festival, Harvest Moon Festival. . . . Many names. . . One Holiday.

I am so excited to celebrate to Moon Festival this year! Such a fun Asian holiday with lots of food and story-telling, two of my most favorite things. We are having a group of peolpe over to celebrate. We are having all sorts of delicious food. . . moon cakes (AKA Krispy Kreme lemon filled doughnuts), spring rolls, pot stickers, fried noodles, spiced cider. . . mmmm.

Today the boys and I made paper lanterns to decorate the house and get ready for the holiday. I can't wait to hang the solar powered lanterns outside tomorrow!

Paradise

Just got back from paradise.

For our tenth anniversary  Dave and I went to Los Cabos on the Baja peninsula in Mexico. It was. . .amazing. In January Dave started planning our trip, based on adoption timing and also having my parents here to watch the boys it seemed September was the best time.

It was simply lovely. The great thing was that it was in our time zone, so no jet lag. Also we didn't spent 2 of our five days on a plane. Dave really outdid himself with the accommodations. We stayed at the Hilton and everything was perfect. Dave booked us a suite. It had a lovely living space with a seating area, computer desk and dining table (complete with chandelier.)  It also had two very spacious bathrooms. With rain shower heads and a jetted tub. Each day we were welcomed by little origami towels. When we arrived it was two swans with "Happy anniversary" spelled out in beans! Then we got a lobster and a little sea urchin. The room was spacious and amazing.

One of my favorite parts was the balcony. It overlooked the ocean and I would lay on the love seat and read my book. Pure. Bliss. The views from our room were spectacular.

The resort was not busy at all, there were hardly any peolpe there. So, there were plenty of lounge chairs pools side and never a wait at any of the restaurants. Everyday we would go lay by the pool, look at the ocean. I would read by the pool, then cool off in the pool and lounge by the edge  in the infinity pool and bask in the calm and warmth. Ahhh. Rinse and repeat  for 4 glorious days. In the afternoon when it got too hot, we'd go back to the air conditioned room and hang out, nap, read on the balcony. . . I think you get the picture. I also managed to squeeze in a full body 80 min. deep tissue massage.

The food was great. A great buffet for breakfast with lots of American/European choices as well as Mexican favorites.  We also had sushi and Italian at the other restaurants on site. Room service was also our friend. Because we had such a lovely dining space we could have late dinners and look out over the ocean.

The property was well maintained and felt like a little piece of Heaven. We got to swim in the ocean and also just walk around and admire the landscape. We even got to take a moonlit stroll on the beach on our last night.

Perfect and lovely in every way. I feel my batteries are totally charged. When Spencer is pouting, Jacob is diving off the couch head first, Ella is having a frantic melt down, Luke is crying and we are still doing midnight feedings with little one. . .  .I can take a deep breath. . . and whisper to myself. . . "Cabo".  Then, I will be be Zen.

Can't wait to celebrate our 15th anniversary.

Ella's book

I have been working on Ella's get to know you book. Once we have our LSC we have been told we can send her a care package. We also did this for Jacob. I made a photobook (with Shutterfly of course) to send to Ella. So she can see our faces. I only hope the nannies can read it to her. I know the transition will be hard. Hopefully this book will help.

Click here to view this photo book larger

The new way to make a photo album: photo books by Shutterfly.

Non-stop

Thinking of Ella, non-stop.

The excitiment of earning a toy

VIDEO0028.mp4 from Karla S on Vimeo.

Jacob just filled with sticker chart with stickers he earned from doing chores. Now we get to go to the store to pick out a special toy. He's pretty excited!

Baby be Blessed

I am so excited. I just got the first doll for my daughter. I friend of mine told me about a totally great site called Baby be Blessed. They make personalized dolls with scripture verses sewn on them. You can choose the hair color & style and skin tone. I chose the one in this photo. I of course ordered it with black hair and also an "Asian" complexion. I also chose a pink dress with a light damask design.

Also the doll truly is personalized. I got to put her name, Ella Xiu and birthday on a patch. For the scripture I was going back and forth between Psalms 46:10 "Be still and know that I am God."  and 2 Thessalonians 3:13 ". . . be not weary in well doing." I love them both, but feel the Psalms verse is a perfect fit for Ella.

If our Japan adoption ends up being a girl I will order another doll and will be using the  2 Thessalonians verse for sure. I think having a girl is going to be amazing. 

Xiu means "beautiful, elegant, grace"

Wednesday Aug. 28, 2013

Wow. Just got some amazing news this morning. . . . although let me start this story with Monday's events.

Monday our agency emailed out information about a little girl in one of their "partnership" orphanages. Basically a partnership orphanage offers more information and better access to medical records. So, our agency sent out this information about Min Xiu Er.

This is what the agency families were told in the email:

Min Xiu Er has been diagnosed with epilepsy and has one leg which is 1cm shorter than the other. Min Xiu Er's cognitive development is normal however and she has normal physical development. Min Xiu Er does walk a bit unstably due to her leg difference which she has not received correction for at this time.

Min Xiu Er likes to sing songs and play with her toys. She also very much likes riding her bike! Min Xiu Er is able to speak some and can say: “bye bye, have porridge, go to school, dance”. Min Xiu Er likes smiling and taking pictures. Attached you will find her adorable photo and infectious smile! Min Xiu Er can imitate reading and enjoys dancing around to music. 
 

After reading about Xiu Dave and I thought this little girl might be a good fit for our family. She is on the older end of our spectrum and is only 6 months younger then Jacob, she would still be one school year younger.  I called the agency coordinator, got her voice mail and left a message. I then sent her an email to inquire (to cover my bases.) But the agency closed for the evening before I got a reply.

Tuesday morning I got an email telling me I would be contacted "soon" with more details. Finally at noon I couldn't wait any longer. I called the agency to get the scoop. They told me "many" families had contacted them about this little girl. They would review all the families who inquired and would match this little girl based on who they felt would be the best match. Kim told me they would contact me by the end of the day (either way). As the work day came to close I was feeling a little sad, no news. Obviously they had selected another family.

So, you can imagine when Kim called this morning I thought she would tell me another family had been chosen.  BUT she told me they felt our family was the best match with the best resources to take care of this little girl. Whoa. I was not expecting her to say that. Especially because I already geared myself up for a rejection phone call.

Wow! I was feeling overwhelmed. Is she really our daughter? Kim said she would email Xiu's file in "a few minutes." It was about 8:45AM, I immediately called Dave. We were both surprised and excited. I immediately left a message with the Pediatric Neurology dept to line up a consult. I also found our orthopedic surgeon's email so I could contact him. We were just so excited to get her file and get some more details on her needs.

The day did not go as planned. At 9:45AM still no file. I was wondering what was going on. Finally at 10AM I send an email to see if the file was sent. No reply. I call at 12:45PM straight to voice mail. I call at 1:45PM, again straight to voice mail. My heart is sinking. Why is it taking hours? She said she would send it in "a few minutes."

I called again at 3PM. By this time I was almost beside myself with worry. I finally was able to get a hold of someone. Apparently they tired to email the file this morning but it didn't go through. The file was 27MB. I don't know why they didn't respond to my emails or voice mails. However, I am just glad to know that the file will be on it's way soon. It is now 3:40PM and I can't wait to get her file and get some medical consults lined up.

Here is a video of Xiu. What a blessing! I am so pleased that we can see her in action. Enjoy.

45612 from gwca on Vimeo.


Friday Aug. 30, 2013


I have been looking at Xiu's pictures non-stop. When the file came it had 6 photos! Six! Can you imagine? It also contained the video in .mp4 format (that was why the zip file was so large.) We have had our pediatrician, Janelle (my sister the nurse) and also Jacob's orthopedic surgeon look at her file and give us some guidance. So far, we feel we can manage all her medical issues. She may also have hip dysplasia along with her limb difference. We feel very comfortable with her orthopedic needs and the surgeries/treatments she will need.


We are still waiting to get in contact with a neurologist. (Although we are feeling epilepsy is going to be manageable.) Our amazing pediatrician has made contact with a neurologist friend and he will try to get in touch with us this weekend. It seems all the stars are aligning. 


Enjoy some photos!

Sunday Sept. 1, 2013

Yesterday we heard from the neurologist. It was good to hear his overview and also possible treatment options. We feel comfortable with all her medical needs. As most parents that adopt an institutionalized child, our biggest concern is attachment issues and the impact of being in an institution.  

Being armed with all the advice from medical professionals and through prayer and fasting we feel that Xiu is our daughter.  My heart is just filled with love and gratitude. She is ours and we are hers. What a powerful feeling. I have felt this before and all I want to do it get on a plane and bring her home today. Unfortunately, it will be a 4-6 month wait. And double sadness- 4 months from now is Chinese New Year, where the whole country shuts down for weeks. I have a feeling it will be closer to 6 months. 

Having Xiu's picture and video is just amazing. We feel we can see her personality and I can already imagine her at the dinner table and playing with her brothers. We also really like the name Xiu (pronounced 'sho'), it means "beautiful, elegant, grace." We will keep it as her middle name.  We have chosen a first name for her, Ella.

Ella Xiu Stirling

Sounds lovely, just lovely.

When we told the boys this morning they were very excited, there was cheering involved. We showed them her photos and Spencer asked if she could run fast. This was the perfect lead in to her special needs. We told the boys she couldn't run very well, because one leg was not as strong as the other. But when she got home Dr. Stotts would help her be a fast runner, just like he helped Jacob. Then we showed them the video. The boys were excited and said they would teach her how to run.  

I am completely filled with joy.

We will submit our LOI (Letter of Intent) on Tuesday and the clock starts ticking, just 4-6 months to go.